I had a bit of a break down. I needed a break. To much for too long. I think I may be back now.
So tonight Chenell and I are having a party. Last year we had one as some of you may remember, I know for a fact one of you does for sure.
We are getting a hotel suite and Chenell is getting a few of her friends to come over and we are going to rip it up. All I have to say is this years party is going to go much much much much much much much better for my wife and I this year. Especially me! LOL I can’t frigging wait. I deserve this lol.
Last year I was in such bad shape my wife had to kind of party with herself. I mean she was definitely a great host! Ask the guests! However I couldn’t walk, wake up, or pee right so I wasn’t to much fun. I’m glad she had a good time though even if it was far less fun than she deserved. Sometimes you got to take what you can get though.
Well this year now that I am getting better she has went and thrown me a party tonight to welcome me back to “being me”! I really need this and my dirty ‘ol man ass is going to have a blast!!
I had a bit of a freak out a while back because my twitches and fascilations came back a bit. Then my dumb ass decided to head online and in the process I started reading about ALS and I freaked myslef out . Imagine that horrid disease. Thank God it was MS and not that. I hope and pray they figure that horrid horrid disease out.
So everything is feeling better again and once again, I had this little period of sucky time, but now I feel better than I did before.
I love how my mind is working again. My wife used to do all the finances because I couldn’t mentally understand it. I have started to do them now. I used to also have a real impulsive personality. Almost Bi-Polar. Not anymore. In fact since I have started to do the bills, and I don’t do dumb shit anymore, our debt is going away. I damn near have JH paid off!
I’m still suffering from some serious anxiety though but it’s all medically related. Every twitch or sore muscle I am scared the shit is back or it’s something else. I started to take some Ativan and it’s doing wonders and I have a appointmet with a shrink to get more.
I have found out that feeling like I do is very common for folk who live thorugh a horrid experiencne. It may be wise for anyone doing this and getting better to seek some psychiatric help. I’m not crazy, just a healing brain can be unbalanced.
So anyhow, as Peter from Family Guy says, “Tonight we are going to party like it’s 9!”